Free to be me - Shelly’s story

Author: Mary Westley

​How many of your life challenges have come from trying to bend yourself to other people’s view of the world…or to meet your own expectations based on who you think the world wants you to be?

When I saw this picture I immediately thought of Shelly, a participant at last years course, and sent her a copy. This was her reply,

“Thank you Mary, I think the fact that all my life I have fought this reality, tried to live within other people’s ideals… is why much of my journey has had challenges… Now, for the first time in my life, I am living a life true to who I am, who I should’ve always been and yes, I am free to be me, a wild, wild woman! Thank you for helping me to believe in myself and to be proud of who I am!”
X Shelly

I was intrigued by Shelly’s comment that she felt that many of her life challenges had come from resisting her own truth. It started me thinking…​

Why is it so difficult to be ourselves in the world?

Where do we go when we aren’t being ourselves?

How did we lose ourselves in the first place?

What are the consequences of living this way?

When I reflect on my own life journey and the stories of hundreds of women I have worked with over the years the following insights go towards answering these questions…

Why is it so difficult to be ourselves in the world? Because we often don’t feel ‘good enough’ or even ‘enough’.

Where do we go when we aren’t being ourselves? We live behind a mask, feeling like a fraud and hoping no one finds out just how ‘not good enough’ we really are.

How did we lose ourselves in the first place? As little children we are like a sponge and form our perception of the world and ourselves based on what we observe and experience. Some of those perceptions are helpful and some aren’t, case in point, ‘I’m not good enough’.

What are the consequences of living this way? We waste precious energy trying to hold up the mask, we eventually make ourselves sick and most importantly, we miss out on living ‘our’ life.’

The majority of my work with women over the last 10 years has focused on supporting them to find their power and come home to their own truth. I love being present for the light bulb moment when a woman begins to:

• Realise that she IS ENOUGH
• Find the power to step out from behind the mask and be herself.
• See and question the beliefs that up to now have informed her life choices, and choose to let go of the ones that no longer serve her.
• Finally start to live ‘her’ life, making choices that support her being a better version of herself. A version in which she feels, happy, healthy and fulfilled.

Shelly is one of these women. When she arrived at a 2WiseWomen course in Bali last year, her 2nd abusive marriage had just come to an end, she was grief stricken and depressed, overweight, broke, and she had never sat on a yoga mat or meditated before. Talk about stepping out on limb.

As a single mum with 4 young children she felt lost and completely overwhelmed by what life was serving up. Well meaning people around her had tried to discourage her from coming saying…”she couldn’t afford it, it wasn’t the right time, what about the kids“. However, despite the opposition Shelly said she knew in her heart she just had to come. So, she organised the kids, borrowed the money and gifted herself the opportunity to pause, reflect and reconnect for the first time in her life.

It’s now 8 months since the retreat, and in that time Shelly has taken her life into her own hands. So what’s changed?

• By exploring and understanding the subtle, and not so subtle, beliefs that had been informing her life choices, she is now beginning to make better choices.
• Instead of allowing her life to be driven by circumstance, she has created a vision of the life she wants for herself and her children, and it’s coming to fruition in ways she couldn’t even imagine.
• Despite being a highly qualified registered nurse, Yoga and Ayurveda have given her insight into what it really means to eat and live well. Her physical and mental health is improving as she consistently makes better day to day choices.
• She is maintaining a regular meditation practice, learning to ignore the naysayers and trusting herself and the universe.

Shelly tells everyone that her life turned around in Bali when she discovered that she could choose to live differently.

“My experience at the 2015 retreat in Ubud was an absolutely life changing and enhancing experience!! An amazing personal transformation from a perception and life experience of sadness, grief, depression, addiction, loneliness, anger, regret… to a whole new amazingly wonderful life filled with hope, faith, love, happiness, gratitude, dreams, endless opportunity, values and beliefs. DREAM BIG = BIG JOY!

Shelly’s experience is the reason Coralie and I have created the 2WiseWomen courses. To share the wisdom of Yoga and Ayurveda, so that you can create a life that supports you to be the best version of yourself.

I think that’s all any of us really want…to be free to be ourselves and enjoy the ride!

So here’s your chance. Are you ready to say yes to discovering how to be the best version of yourself possible?

We know you will come away a better you…we have seen it time and time again…you just have to come.
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